Our new framer at work is very subtly condescending to me, and I don’t fucking like it.

Im taller than the average woman in my country, so because I work with a majority of women, that means that I’m taller than almost all of them. I was laughing the other day because my co-manager was having a list for me, but she’s so little that all I could see over the grid was a hand and a piece of waving paper and she’s like “*pout* Well not all of us can be five seven!”

Which made me start laughing even more because I’m five nine. Lol, smol squishy.

Nooooo

I have NEVER heard a commercial for my store, ever, in my entire life. The first one I heard today announced to me that our black Friday sales were extended through today and then detailed several high priority products that were more than half off and said “SO COME IN TODAY FOR OUR BLACK FRIDAY/WEEKEND/”

I shrieked all the way across the bridge across state lines

I pet a puppy for the first time today?????

It was very soft????

Getting freaky on Black Friday

The scene: my workplace break room
Characters: two full grown women who are no longer in college

There is pie on the table, an assortment of holiday foods, cookies, and side dishes

I am spraying whipped cream into my bosses mouth chanting “Chug chug chug chug!”

I feel like the Pacific Northwest…my oregons hurt….

Me making bad puns at work to compensate for physical pain

Tonight, on the night of the super moon, I was gifted two boxes of candy bones from work because they were expired seasonal and unsellable.

The universe is telling me to curse some people. I gladly accept.

Just found out that a co-worker that I made the ever-so-dangerous leap to perhaps begin considering a friend, voted third party. I’m so tired.

Don’t tell anyone in my family that I put ketchup on my arroz con frijoles- my abuelo is already spinning in his grave and we don’t want him to rise

Zombie grandpa jokes at work

We had a straight up fucking nazi/klansmember complete with tattoos and a jacket with symbols and patches depicting the whole men in white hoods attacking black people- in our store yesterday, first lurking and trying to steal- and then when he came through checkout I was racing against the clock trying to manipulate the line in a particular way so our ONLY black cashier didn’t have to deal with him.

The girl who ended up cashing him out was sixteen and had no fucking clue, but I and the other girl knew what the fuck was up. My higher manager had her eye on him because he was being sketch but was like “I thought it was a costume”. Really, we’re in the middle of small town Kentucky, and the dude not only has the balls the step out of the house looking like that, his tattoos are faded and most definitely real.

What the fuck